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Arch Ang3l
November 18th, 2007, 07:09 PM
A wealthy couple had planned to go out for the evening. The woman of the house decided to give their butler, Jeeves, the rest of the night off. She said they would be home very late, and that he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, however, the wife wasn’t having a good time at the party, so she came home early, alone. Her husband had to stay there, as several of his important clients were there.
As the woman walked into her house, she saw Jeeves sitting by himself in the dinning room. She called for him to follow her, and led him into the master bedroom. She looked at him and smiled. “Jeeves,” she said. “Take off my dress.”
He did this carefully.
“Jeeves,” she continued. “Take off my stockings and garter.”
He silently obeyed her.
“Jeeves,” she then said. “Remove my bra and panties."
As he did this, the tension continued to mount.
She then said, “Jeeves, if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you’re fired!” (And what was YOUR dirty mind thinking!)

Since I cant edit, and I found another, and I dont wanna post another thread, I shall post it here.
I do hope this is ok with you mods.


An extremely unattractive and mean looking woman walks into Walmart with her 2 kids. She is greeted with a welcome from a male staff member who cheerfully says, "Hello ma'am, I hope you re having a great morning, welcome to Walmart!"
The somewhat manly and butchy woman replies "I'm not in the mood for any of your cheery bull****. Just tell me where the damn lawn fertilizer is."
The staff member taken by surprise by the woman's sour demeanour replies, " Down this aisle to your left, past the lawn mowers." He then adds, "Are your children twins?"
"No you mindless idiot, the boy is 9 and the girl is 7" replies the woman. "Do they look like they're twins?" she growls.
"No, they don't ... I just can't believe you've been f*cked twice" he said.

Crazy Jamie
November 18th, 2007, 07:12 PM
The first one is somewhat old, but funny.

I really like the second one.

FalconZero
November 18th, 2007, 08:15 PM
First one was clever, hadn't seen it before. 7.5/10

Second one was heartless and cruel. I LOVE IT! 9/10

Overall: :^:

Azthris
November 18th, 2007, 10:47 PM
Yeah I liked the second one. As Jamie said, the first is old, buts its still funny.

:)

Mike!
November 18th, 2007, 10:57 PM
Unlike most people in this thread, I haven't heard the first one. And, it was damned funny. Second was better. But both jokes were great!

:^:

Velocity
November 19th, 2007, 12:39 AM
1st one: Decent, hadn't heard it before.

2nd one: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Man if I was in that situation I would've been thinking the same thing.

bman3k
November 19th, 2007, 01:50 AM
I've never heard either and liked both, 9/10

Major Isoor
November 19th, 2007, 02:41 AM
Yeah, the first one was good, and I haven't heard it before (or seen it in this case) and the second one was even better! :D 8.8/10

Mrmakee
November 19th, 2007, 02:52 AM
Loved the second one! 10/10

First one was ok.

Tubby_23
November 19th, 2007, 04:11 AM
They both were pretty good, I hadn't heard the first one though.

1st Joke: 7.5/10
2nd Joke: 9.5/10

Mharll
November 19th, 2007, 10:30 AM
Both are good stuff 8.5/10

Freakout
November 19th, 2007, 02:11 PM
First one is vaguely old, but the second one was good.

:chuckle:

Spiner202
November 19th, 2007, 04:59 PM
I've never heard either, the first one was good but the second one = win:D.

KingJazzaD12
November 20th, 2007, 05:11 AM
lol i like dirty jokes 7.2/10 overall

Vermillion
November 20th, 2007, 03:59 PM
1) 7/10

2) 7/10

Sephiroth Strife
November 24th, 2007, 03:02 PM
heard the first one before. My grandfather claimed that happend with his (now dead) wife.

The second one good.

KingJazzaD12
November 27th, 2007, 06:13 PM
yeah i think ive heard them before maybe in a dream one of them...

Air Head
November 27th, 2007, 08:49 PM
Heard Both, or variation,

7/10 first one

8.5/10 second. good job