Poem - \\Frisky Obsession'', concerning male fixation with women

[Clint Eastwood]

this concerns a certain relationship of mine, but also the general fixation/obsession heterosexual men with women and their bodyparts, (with undertones of masturbation, sexuality, relationships and breakups) etc.....
sorry if this is a bit raunchy, be warned, but it came from the heart.
thanks.

At first i thought she was not vain but just aware

Of every little circumstance which involved her head of hair

By her certain criteria there are things she won't allow

I wondered as i talked to her ''Could she tell me how?''

And i could see what she meant to me, every lock of hair was a prize to me,

And she never knew how it pleased me, thank god she never knew how it supplied me,

With energy beyond me, through me, that i didn't know belonged to me

And how it all surprised me, it ****ing hypnotized me

EuphoriCIZED me

But it also denied me

And took away a piece of me

-

And her friends agreed with me that she was not vain but just aware

All i know is, at the time, i didn't care

But certain elements i noticed that i hadn't seen were there

Made me think twice about her every lock of hair

I never really knew her, but i knew she was there

But then i thought three times about every lock of hair

-

Then my friends and i agreed that she was not vain but just aware

Time passed and we talked and then she knew that i was there

Soon in the dullness of the evening we'd sit down and i'd stroke her hair

And me in the epitome of my manhood sitting right there, stroking her hair, although very unexpectedly, shuddering as it dawned on me, wishing she wasn't there.

And then she came to know i ****ing wished she wasn't there

And as soon as she came home she would be pulling out her hair

In all of our knowing and all of our constant glowing she mentally tied me to a chair and as if i didn't expect it she started cutting off her hair and joy division were playing she's lost control as she struck me then and there

And she sits wailing on the ground, because i wished she wasn't there

-

Then for a while

I forgot aallllllllllllll about it

And with a shoulder of vodka and a smile

I randomly amalgamated with some girl under a big silver ball, and we formed a conglomerate.

-

And although the time had faded

(the world must have felt jaded)

I felt things i never had calculated

As she tapped on my chamber door

And through halls and halls of baited

Traps with pictures of me or pictures of something to see, ever so well calculated

The fondness which i had once created, (out of nothing)

Came back every time she tapped on my chamber door

And as if by every tap something was translated

Every time i thought of her as she patiently waited

Every time i had thought of her naked,

The fact that she had, in one of our early meetings, referred to herself walking using the word ''preambulated''

They all came back as she screamed and cried outside my chamber door

And i pulled it down and as if ignoring all the time that had faded, all the things i had never calculated, and the fact that the world was jaded,

We embraced standing over the shards of the door

I don't hate you any more!!

I never really hated you!

It was just the constant tension!

I don't hate you any more!

It was just the situation!

I don't hate you any more!


if you are further interested, please read my other works http://www.fictionpress.com/~tblackeye
that site is actually class. thanks for reading