YAY! more problems...

[wheelsim]

So yeah if u guys read my other posts ude know my life sucks so... here we go.

See i met this girl about 3 weeks ago now ends up being in marching band with me, freshman, and oh yeah one of my friends sister... I ask this other girl to homecoming but she had to go to indiana during that weekend. At the point I was going to ask the first one, i find out she got one of the white flowers so that sucked. Then i get to the dance and find out she never even went with anyone... I also find out that she likes a guy who happenes to be a friend of mine (dating someone though(who is also a friend)). lol I also end up talking to her brother about me liking her and he said someone already asked him about her but he wouldnt tell me (made me think(still have no idea who it is)). So i though to myself only way to get closer to her is if i just talked to her more often, since we dont have any classes togheter since she is freshman and im junior. First 2-3 days it was good. Then all of the sudden all of these guys started coming up to and talking to her while we were talking. To top on that it seems that she is more interested on talking to the other guys rather than me. So yeah im not sure how to handle this... this is where u come in :D

[AlphaConfidence]

Well are you just "talking" to her, or are you flirting with her? If just talking it's only going to turn you into just a friend. Watch out if that's not what you want. She sounds like she has a lot of people grabbing for her attention. That can actually work for you in the long run.

Usually a guy will do some pretty stupid things to get a girls attention if she's in a group of guys. Mostly follow her around like a stray puppy, trying to lean in and get close to her, or kiss her arse. I've always notice that if I didn't do those things i'd get her attention a lot more easy. My advice is going to sound somewhat illogical but it's been hightly successful. It's a good way to stand out from the crowed and getting her to want to talk to you. And yes, I use this myself and it works.

1) Next time you're in a group chat up everyone in it but her.

2) Don't follow her like a sick puppy. Make your body language show that you're somewhat disintrested and have better things to do in your life than chase her.

3) If she does something silly briefly turn your attention to her and call her on it. You want to tease her a little to show her that you're different and you're able to generate your own fun. Don't put too much attention into her untill she starts getting more open to you. There is also a line between teasing and making fun of someone. Make sure you don't cross it.

4) If you've been doing steps on 1-3 good enough she'll most likely be wondering why you're so different and say little things to chat you up. This is when you begin to converse with her as you would normally.

The point of this advice being doing things differently to draw her attention. It's highly effective if done right. Give it a try. I promise you it's a lot better then what you're doing now.

[Grey Angel]

You know, I was going to suggest the same thing. Apparently, the nicer you try to be to a girl, the less interested they are in you b/c they'll always see you as a friend, and use you knowing that you'll do anything for them, but if you seem disinterested, then they'll think that you're different, and try to get to know you better. By acting better than she is, you're generating value for yourself, making yourself seem better than her and anyone else trying to steal your thunder, and if someone else tries to be better than you at this point, don't let it affect you, but be more interested in that guy instead.

Basically, by ignoring her, and teasing her, she'll want to get closer b/c she'll be wondering why you aren't giving her any attention, and bu chatting it up with all the other guys doing the same thing, and taking over the conversation (which is naturally easy), you'll be the best choice for her to go for.

[wheelsim]

Wow thanks reps for both of yalls!

[Quixotron]

I agree. I have also noticed that if you try to be nice to a girl and crud, she'll see you as a friend. Well i think she's intelligent enough to see that you're intersted in her in a bf/gf manner, but she'll play it down and turn you into an asociate or colleague. Last girl that did that to me, i turned her down cold turkey, not becoz she didn't get with me, but becoz she humilated me. If she woulda said, Quix(not my real name) i dont like you, then i would have had respect for her instead of misleading me and making a fool out of me.

So, yeah, the tricky part is to be around her but not acknowledge her. Yeah, thats totally counter-intuitive and even in us adult ranks, i still have to play the stupid "game" although not as bad as it were in high school or college.