War [03.07.07]

[Dean]

Pro Wrestling Warriors presents:
War
Hinchliffe Stadium - Paterson, New Jersey - 10,000
[03.07.07]

Pro Wrestling Warriors makes its debut in New Jersey and sells out the Hinchliffe arena. On the card tonight includes PWW World Tag Team Champion Tyler Hart in action against the debuting Kenn Xenon, as well as a World Championship match against two friends who have been turned against each other through avarice, Drake Vinaldi and Roderick Brookes. Up next is the debut of Dun against PWW’s resident billionaire, Richard Storrs.

The intense segment between Drake Vinaldi and Roderick Brookes (http://forums.gamewinners.com/forums/showthread.php?t=525945), despite what may have been claimed earlier, was actually the opening segment of War, joined in progress as Vinaldi was making his entrance to the ring. Afterwards, however, a special video package airs containing the events that occurred at Malice…

Scott The Scoop:
Wrestling fans around the globe are about to witness one of the greatest spectacles displayed in wrestling history!

Komodo:
It’s going to be a hell of a show, Scott. You can thank me later for boosting ratings.

Araña turns around and runs towards the corner, running up the ropes and looking for a frankensteiner… he connects! Linden hits the mat, and Araña gets to his feet, spring boarding up to the top rope once more. He then flies off, looking for a shooting star press, but Linden rolls out of the way.

Komodo:
Too much flop and not enough flip there, Scotty! Those high-risk moves rarely pay off.

As Araña gets to his feet on the outside, Linden runs to the ropes and comes back, leaping up to the top rope… and flipping through the air onto Araña in the crowd… PLANCHA! Both men are down, and the fans have no choice but to chant “PWW!”. Every fan is on their feet, applauding the efforts of both men in this opening contest.

Scott The Scoop:
These men are laying it all on the line!

Komodo:
What the hell are they thinking? It’s not like there’s a title on the line.

It looks to be time for the Shooting Linden Press. Chris is perched on the top rope and then stands up straight… but Araña suddenly shoots up and slams himself into the ropes, crotching Linden on the top. Araña is going for a modified Spiderrana, but Linden holds onto him! Chris places his hands underneath Araña’s thighs and flips him backwards to the mat, but Araña lands on his feet. Linden now flies forward, looking for a super sunset flip onto Araña! He tries to get Araña to roll backwards… but he sits down on top of Linden for a cover! Araña hooks one of the legs and uses his free hand to grab the ropes!

Scott The Scoop:
Araña just stole a win tonight in our opening contest!

Komodo:
That wasn’t “stealing,” Scott. That was ingenuity. I’ve gotta hand it to the kid. I didn’t think he had it in him.

Simpson:
Tonight, Michael Magnum and Chris Justice...

Magnum:
The Best. Tag Team. Ever.

Simpson:
Right... Best Tag-Team Ever versus PWW Tag Team Champions The Awakening. You beat them tonight and I shall grant you a rematch for the PWW Tag Team titles at any future PWW event that I desire. How's that?

Magnum:
Jim, that's just great.

Scott The Scoop:
Can you believe this, Mr. Komodo? The PWW Tag Champs didn’t even know they were going to wrestle tonight!

Komodo:
This is bullsh*t, plain and simple, Scott. You have two people who are as close to being worthy of holding gold around this place as anyone getting screwed over. I know what it’s like to lose your title in an impromptu title match, Scotty, and it ain’t fun. Hopefully Reckless Youth can kill off Simpson’s suitors before they become a real problem.

Hart meets Justice with a stiff kick to the kidneys. Justice favors his side as Hart pulls him towards him. Justice’s kidney si driven into Hart’s knee with a uranage backbreaker. Tyler Hart isolates Chris Justice and Wicked enters the ring. They double team Irish whip Justice to the ropes, and Zack Wicked hits the opposite set of ropes. Hart ducks down and Justice leaps over him… but Zack Wicked comes back at Justice and levels the hell out of him with a massive lariat!

Scott The Scoop:
LARIATOOOO! JUSTICE IS DEAD!

Wicked gets on top of Justice and gets the one, two, thr- no! Justice kicks out! The fans begin to rally behind Chris as Zack Wicked pulls him back to his feet.

Scott The Scoop:
The capacity crowd tonight at Malice is actually getting behind these two goofballs!

Komodo:
It doesn’t surprise me, Scott. These morons could never recognize talent.

Justice spins around behind Wicked and yells as he rushes him forwards into the ropes. Wicked hangs onto the ropes as Chris Justice rolls backwards and back onto his feet. Zack Wicked turns around, and Michael Magnum walks onto the apron and slams Wicked in the back with a stiff kick. Zack staggers forward right into a kick to the gut from Chris Justice. Wicked bends forward, and Justice hits the ropes, coming back at Wicked and flooring him with a swinging neckbreaker!

Scott The Scoop:
They’re mounting a comeback! Can you believe this, Mr. Komodo?

Komodo:
Come on, Zack. What are you, stupid? How could you fall for that…

Hart is caught with a few forearms to the face before being given an Irish whip. Hart reverses the move, and Magnum springboards off the ropes… crossbody! Zack Wicked yells from the apron as Michael Magnum suddenly goes out onto the apron. He springboards in… springboard 450 Splash! Magnum pins Hart… who kicks out just before the three!

Scott The Scoop:
I don’t think I’ve EVER seen Magnum and Justice this motivated to win a match.

Komodo:
I’ll give you that, Scott. I had no earthly idea they had it in ‘em.

Wicked pulls Justice into the Wickedbomb position near the ropes, and Tyler Hart prepares a big team maneuver… but Michael Magnum tugs Chris Justice’s leg, bringing him back down to the mat. Tyler Hart runs forward and Zack Wicked grabs him, looking to propel him into a spear onto both members of the BTTE, but Magnum yells “JUMP!”. Chris Justice does so, and Magnum sidesteps Tyler Hart, who goes crashing through headfirst to the floor.

Magnum now yells “DUCK!” and Chris does as Magnum springboards into the ring with a big dropkick to Wicked’s face. BTTE rush him forward into the ropes before rolling him backwards into a double small package. They get Wicked’s shoulders on the mat… unfortunately, the referee exclaims that he isn’t legal. Justice and Magnum see Tyler Hart rushing at them again and now give HIM a double small package… BTTE wins!

Komodo:
I can’t believe these two clowns beat Hart and Wicked.

Scott The Scoop:
I can only imagine how upset Darius Falcon is right now.

Linden grabs Araña as he’s partying with some female strippers. He drives his head into the wall and then kicks him out of the arena, seeming happy with himself.

Cross lays a few more stomps to Myles before lifting him up and sitting him in the chair. AJ backs away… and begins chanting. “OLÉ, OLÉ OLÉ OLÉ!”. The fans chant along with him, and AJ… skips, yes, skips forward… olé kick to Ravington! Myles falls out of the chair in a daze as Cross stands up and soaks in the cheers.

Komodo:
This is the most ridiculous sh*t I have ever seen.

Scott The Scoop:
I agree… I think Myles Ravington is in a LOT more pain than he’s letting on, Mr. Komodo.

Komodo:
…Are you kidding me?

AJ lifts himself up to one knee, but Ravington gets behind him and begins to grate the kitchen tool over the forehead of AJ Cross. Cross screams in pain, but there’s no one to help him, and soon his face is a mutilated blend of peach and crimson.

Scott The Scoop:
God, this is disgusting… I can hardly stand to look at this.

Komodo:
If you get squeamish over this trip to the candy store, I hope you never have to call matches in Singapore, Scotty.

Ravington smirks and picks up his scepter. He walks over to AJ, laughs, then nails Cross. AJ is cracked in the skull and he begins to fall towards the table below… no! Cross manages to shoot his left leg up and hook onto the top rope with his right leg, keeping himself from falling through the table. Ravington is too busy taunting the crowd to notice AJ snaking his body back into the ring. As Cross begins to pull himself up with the ropes, Myles runs at Cross, looking for another scepter shot… AJ ducks! Myles is back dropped over the top with his scepter… and goes straight through the table!

Komodo:
Holy hell, did that backfire. I knew I shouldn’t have bet money on this crap!

Scott The Scoop:
Now’s his chance!

Ravington climbs up to the second rope and attempts the Royal Slam… but AJ Cross nails Ravington in the kidneys with punches and shoves him forward, sending Myles back first into the tacks! Myles shouts in pain and rolls around the ring. YOSHI jumps onto the apron and tries to get involved… but only gets a superkick for his troubles! Ravington gets up and turns around… AJ gives Ravington the Cross Cutter face first into the tacks! Both men have tacks stuck in them, but Ravington is worse off. AJ Cross now makes the cover… and this war is over.

Scott The Scoop:
I think AJ Cross has earned respect from everybody in this arena for that match.

Komodo:
Not me.

Simons and Stokes grapple momentarily as Simons uses his size advantage to lock his leg behind Stokes’ and slowly bridge him downward, bringing him into the canvas while maintaining a knuckle lock. Simons removes his leg from behind Stokes and jumps on top of his thighs, forcing all of his weight downSimons jumps off Stokes thighs and jumps on him again, to the same effect of Stokes maintaining his balance. Simons tries to jump on Stokes’ thighs again, but this time Stokes drops down, sticks his feet in the air, and catches Simons, balancing him in the air. He kicks Simons off, returns to his feet, and jumps into the air, placing his feet on the hips of his opponent. He monkey flips Simons over, sending him into the canvas. The Unknown gets back to his feet and fires a forearm, despite still having his hands interlocked with his opponent’s. Stokes counters with a big knee to the gut and manages to break free of the knuckle lock as he leaps into the air and wraps his legs around Simons head with a huracarrana!

Scott The Scoop:
What a display of technical ability! You can certainly appreciate this, right, Mr. Komodo?

Komodo:
Tell me you’re joking, Scott. Look at the fans – They’re bored to tears! Put some showmanship into it, you statues. Don’t you have an ounce of charisma in your entire BODIES?

Stokes grabs hold of the top rope, waiting on Simons to return to his feet. He does, and Stokes springs off the top rope… corkscrew plancha suicida! Both Stokes and Simons get wiped out on the outside, and the fans cheer the action on.

Scott The Scoop:
What a dive! I can’t believe the way Stokes put his body on the line.

Stokes blocks an attempt of the Blind Eye Halo and turns around… Northern Lights Suplex… Simons kicks out and keeps the front facelock. He returns to his feet… SICK DDT! Stokes gets driven into the canvas, and Simons makes the cover… but Maria Rounds gets on the apron. Simons gets in her face, and she cusses him out. Stokes manages to grab Simons from behind into a schoolboy with the tights! One, two, thre-no! That was close. Simons gets back to his feet… LARIAT! He drives Stokes into the canvas, but pulls him back to his feet… BLIND EYE HALO! Simons decimates him with the move, and the pinfall follows.

Scott The Scoop:
Michael Simons picks up another victory tonight. A world title is just around the corner for this young man.

Komodo:
Remind me to sell my stock in PWW right before that happens, ‘K?

Scott The Scoop:
Up next is our Traditional Title match. This is going to be a hell of a fight under the Submit to Commit rules. You have to make your opponent tap before you can climb the ladder and grab the belt.

Tristan Novak tries to whip Michaels into the barricade, but gets reversed and tastes steel. Michaels taunts the crowd, imitating a ‘rope-a-dope’ motion. He runs toward Novak, but Tristan ducks under and sends Michaels crashing into the crowd. Michaels is sprawled out among a few chairs Novak rolls back inside and jumps from the top rope of the ring all the way inside the crowd and on Michaels with a dangerous crossbody!

Scott The Scoop:
This is out of control! I can’t believe Tristan just cleared that distance!

Komodo:
Why? Chris Linden did it earlier in the show.

Scott The Scoop:
…I think what you’re saying is that any man can step up his game and be on the same level as any other wrestler here in PWW.

Komodo:
Except me. As far as I’m concerned, they’re all beneath me here, Scott.

Novak grabs two chairs and throws one inside, keeping the other for himself. Michaels grabs the other chair, They battle each other with the chairs, emulating a swordfight, with neither man getting an advantage. Novak lets his temper get the best of him, charging Alex for a shot. Michaels ducks under and quickly smacks Tristan in the head with the chair, sending him to the mat.

Scott The Scoop:
Oh, a terrible mistake by Tristan Novak!

Komodo:
Looks like he’ll need some anger management and cosmetic surgery. Good thing we’re in New York. I bet they have a place here that does both in the same building.

Novak grabs a chair and drives it right into Michaels’ knee. He places the chair around Alex’s leg, setting it to break Michaels’ leg. Novak climbs to the top rope, but Alex kicks the chair off his foot, grabs it, and throws the chair, connecting with Tristan’s face! Michaels gets a boost of energy and runs up the ropes, grabs Novak, and launches him halfway across the ring with a stepladder belly-to-belly suplex!

Scott The Scoop:
Look at Alex shut out the pain!

Komodo:
You call that pain, Scott? That’s nothing compared to some of the injuries I’ve had.

Tristan Novak gets to his feet and grabs Alex Michaels as he’s doubled over. He’s going for the Abolition! Michaels manages to counter into a back bodydrop, but Novak lands on his feet, showing incredible agility. Tristan grabs the chair and turns toward Michaels, smacking him right in the knee! Michaels falls to the mat, writhing in pain.

Scott The Scoop:
God, Komodo, this is getting hard to watch… Alex is in so much pain.

Alex Michaels grabs an extension cable and wraps the extension cord around Tristan’s throat, choking him! The referee checks to see if Novak wants to submit. Novak manages to turn and fire a few punches to Michaels’ head to force him to release his grip on the cord. Novak feverishly unwraps the cord and unplugs it from a piece of equipment lying around. He takes the cord and goes underneath the bottom rope, inside the ring, and then tosses it over the top rope. He brings it back down to where Michaels is and ties it around his leg. Novak ties the rope around Michaels’ leg and ties a knot to secure it. He goes over to the part of the rope that is underneath the ring rope and begins pulling… and Michaels ends up hanging upside down from the top rope! Novak places his foot on the cord so Michaels will have his leg exposed. He grabs the steel chair, grinning sadistically. Novak grabs the chair and… BOOM! He blasts Michaels’ knee with a vicious chair shot as the ropes suspend him. Tristan has no conscience and nails another shot to the knee. Michaels screams as Novak unloads a third shot and drops the chair.

Scott The Scoop:
Tristan Novak has no conscience! This is wrong… This is morally reprehensible, and I can’t stand to watch this…

Komodo:
Get a hold of yourself, Scott. Somebody has to call this match, and I’m damn sure not going to.

Novak charges Michaels and swings at him with the chair, but Alex ducks, and Tristan connects with the top rope, causing the chair to crack right back in his head! Michaels spins Novak around and lifts him… and drives him onto the chair with the Alex Michaels Experience! Michaels’ patented Orange Crush Bomb pulls off, and he immediately applies the Eclectic Lock! Novak is trapped in the dreaded submission hold. Tristan has no choice but to tap!

Scott The Scoop:
Alex Michaels can climb the ladder!

Komodo:
Well, yippee skippy, Scott. Let’s throw a party.

Alex returns with the ladder, but Novak launches himself through the ropes with a suicide dive! Michaels grabs his leg, which has to be killing him. Novak slides the ladder out of the way. Novak rolls Alex inside the ring, but keeps him close enough to drag his leg toward the ring post. He grabs Michaels’ bad leg… and smacks it off the knee post! Alex screams but blocks the attempt the second time. He kicks Novak away, sending him into the barriers. Michaels tries to pull himself up, but Novak grabs the steel chair and smacks it against Alex’s leg, crushing it between the steel post and the chair. Tristan grabs Alex around the legs… and applies a figure-four leg-lock around the turnbuckle post! He drops down with all his weight on Michaels’ leg. Alex screams in pain and has no choice. He taps out.

Scott The Scoop:
Now Tristan can climb the ladder!

Komodo:
Yes, Scott, we know the rules. Everybody understands the rules. Even the five year old who’s watching this program because of neglectful parents gets it.

Alex shoves the barricade back, grabs the ladder, and places it across the barricade and the ring apron, like a bridge. Tristan grabs Alex and lifts him into the air before dropping him front-first on the ladder with a modified front suplex. He climbs onto the apron, does a little taunt, and nails a spiral leg drop on the back of Alex Michaels’ neck!

Scott The Scoop:
Tristan Novak has a sick mind to come up with these moves…

Komodo:
Sick, creative, it’s all the same around here.

Novak and Michaels exchange punches now, battling atop the ladder. Tristan blocks one of Michaels’ punches and smacks his face off the top of the ladder. He climbs to the top and looks up at the belt… but instead, Tristan jumps over and grabs Michaels around his legs, flipping forward… ROLLING SUPERBOMB! The fans go crazy as Tristan drops down and brings all of Michaels’ weight crashing to the canvas with the maneuver.

Scott The Scoop:
It’s anybody’s game now, Komodo! Who do you think is going to win?

Komodo:
No idea, Scott. I don’t know if anybody can “win” in a fightlike this.

Novak ties the extension cord around Alex’s leg, and the camera gets a decent shot of the large machine it’s attached to – some type of generator used for the various electronic devices in the arena. Novak knots the cord around Michaels’ leg and then decides to pursue the title. Alex watches helplessly as Novak pulls himself up the ladder.

Scott The Scoop:
This is bullcrap! Bullcrap, Jack!

Komodo:
Ah, wake up and small the coffee, junior. This is wrestling.

Michaels grabs the cord and starts pulling on it. With all his strength, he barely budges the generator a few centimeters. Michaels gets to his feet and limps toward the ladder. He can’t quite reach. Michaels screams as he pulls the cord again, and this time causes the generator to scoot a good foot and a half. Michaels grabs the ladder as Novak is mere inches from the belt and shoves it with all his might, sending the ladder toppling over, and Tristan Novak through the table on the outside!

Komodo:
HOLY SH*T!

Scott The Scoop:
…What he said!

Michaels fires a huge series of rights to Novak, causing him to nearly fall. One arm and leg of Tristan Novak go off the ladder, and he starts to fall, but he manages to swing back and fire a huge shot to the reigning champ. Alex leans back, and it looks like he’s gonna go back down to the mat. Michaels regains his composure, and each man grabs hold of the title now. They each have a hand on it as they fight atop the ladder. The belt gets removed from its suspension, and they’re struggling over it. Novak pulls it toward him… Michaels tugs it back his way. They pull at the same time, and end up falling to the mat, each with their hands wrapped around it.

Michael Simons watches as Novak and Michaels continue to argue, unknowing of Simons walking to the ring. The Unknown gets in Alex Michaels’ face, and Novak shoves Simons out of the way, telling him to mind his own business. Michael seems to be walking away… but grabs Novak from behind, drilling him into the mat with the Blind Eye Halo! Simons grabs Michaels around the leg and lifts him high into the air before dropping him across his own leg with a shin breaker! Michaels falls to the mat, holding his leg in pain, and Simons grins sadistically as he leaves the ring, making his mark on this pay-per-view…

Komodo:
This one is far from over, Scott; FAR from over.

Scott The Scoop:
Can you imagine the battles between these three?

Bauer carries Cavallo down the corridor towards a snack table. Conveniently standing by are Tyler Hart, Zack Wicked, and Darius Falcon. The three members of the Awakening watch as Will Bauer drags his opponent toward them. He slams Rob’s head on the table and asks for assistance from his buddies. However, they refuse to lend him a hand, remaining still. Bauer looks a bit shocked, and turns, to be hit with an entire cake to the face! The icing blinds Bauer. hits the Time Traveler! Rob looks up at the Awakening, who surprisingly refuses to move. Cavallo jumps up onto the snack table, watching Bauer lay motionless. He leaps off… FALL FROM VALHALLA! Cavallo lands with quite an impact, and sprawls his body across his rivals. The referee counts 1…2…3! Cavallo has done it!

Scott The Scoop:
What is the deal with The Awakening?

Komodo:
I think we’re about to find out…

The Awakening suddenly begin kicking and stomping him into the ground! Falcon, Hart, and Wicked beat Bauer into oblivion before throwing him through the doors to the outside of the arena.

Komodo:
Well, it looks like Will Bauer won’t be returning any time soon…

Falcon connects with a huge leg lariat to the head, sending King into the ropes from the impact. Falcon rebounds off the opposite ropes and tries to clothesline King over the top rope. The size is too much to overcome, however, and King barely budges. Falcon rebounds off the ropes again, but this time King ducks under, causing Falcon to get caught in the ropes. King runs to the opposite ropes and tries to do the move to Falcon, but Darius wisely pulls the top rope down, causing King’s own momentum to send him over the top rope, crashing to the outside floor!

Komodo:
Smart move by Falcon. Now let’s see him follow up.

Scott The Scoop:
Perhaps he’ll forgo his usual taunting this time.

Falcon drags a ladder on the mat. Darius has the end with the legs, and King grabs the top of the ladder. They end up having a tug of war over the ladder. Falcon tugs it, and then King pulls it back. Falcon pulls it again, and this time, when King pulls it back, Falcon shoves forward, sending King into the turnbuckles with the top of the ladder against his stomach. Falcon places the ladder on the canvas, making an incline. He runs to the opposite corner and returns by running up the ladder and nailing a huge leg lariat, connecting with King’s jaw.

Scott The Scoop:
Falcon is in rare form tonight, Jack.

Komodo:
Yeah, he’s really thinking on his feet.

Darius opens the ladder and grabs King by his hair, pulling and dragging him toward the ladder. He manages to pull King so he’s trapped between the top of the ladder and the hinges. King is on his hands and knees as Falcon turns the ladder upside down, setting it up in the center of the ring. Darius climbs onto the ladder, kicking the hinges in so they stick into King’s back. Falcon grabs either side of the ladder and pushes them together, painfully driving the ladder’s hinges into the spine of his heated adversary. Darius keeps this up until King, with a burst of energy and raw power, tips the ladder over, causing Falcon to tumble to the mat in the process. Darius is virtually unscathed, and gets back to his feet quickly. King gets out of the hinges, but Falcon smacks him across the back with a steel chair.

Scott The Scoop:
This is one of the most vile rivalries I’ve ever seen!

Komodo:
Hell, it’s one of the most vile rivalries I’ve ever seen, Scott. Now that’s saying something.

Darius manages to roll King onto the table, his back facing upward. Darius steps onto the apron and then climbs to the top turnbuckle. He grabs hold of the ladder and leapfrogs over, trying to connect on King with a double legdrop to his back. Adrian rolls off the table at the last minute, causing Darius to crash through! The crowd pops as Falcon lies in the shards of wood, cursing in pain.

Scott The Scoop:
What a miscalculation by Darius Falcon! Let’s see King capitalize here, Komodo.

Darius grabs a steel chair and sets it up in the center of the ring. Falcon lifts King and manages to sort-of whip him into the ropes. It’s more like a shove really, but King rebounds. Falcon attempts a drop toehold onto the steel chair, but King barely gets any momentum due to the difficulty in moving him, especially for someone of Falcon’s size. Instead, King grabs Darius, lifts him into the air, and drops him throat-first on the top of the chair with a gorilla press!

Scott The Scoop:
Oh… gee… what a shame it would be if Falcon couldn’t talk after this.

Falcon gets to his feet and pulls himself up on the apron. He grabs hold of the ropes and tries to step inside the ring, but King suddenly grabs hold of the ladder and charges Falcon. Using the ladder as a battering ram, King smashes Falcon in the head! Falcon gets knocked off the apron and goes through the table! King throws the ladder down and rolls out of the ring. He drags Falcon out of the broken table and rolls him back inside. King places the ladder in the center of the ring. He lifts Falcon and whips him into the ropes… ABATTOIR ON THE LADDER! King hooks both legs and gets the pinfall.

Scott The Scoop:
Adrian King is a monster!

Komodo:
That man has no remorse, Scott, and I can’t blame him.

Scott The Scoop:
Well, now that King is able to climb the ladder and Falcon still can’t, we’ll see if King can truly capitalize and defeat his former leader.

Darius uses one of the legs of a chair to jab King between his legs, striking him in the groin as he’s facing away from him on a ladder. Falcon tosses the chair aside and climbs behind King. He grabs Adrian around the head and arm, and with one of his feet, he kicks the ropes, causing the ladder to topple back… Ladder-assisted Russian Leg Sweep! King’s face gets smashed underneath.

Komodo:
This is Darius’ chance to cover him!

Darius lifts himself so he’s sitting on the top rope. He sets up a tornado DDT, but King blocks the attempt with some heavy hands to the stomach. Adrian wraps a meaty hand around Falcon’s throat, preparing to turn and chokeslam him onto the ladders. Falcon blocks the endeavor with a poke to the eye. He turns King around, so he’s facing the same direction as he, and quickly leaps off the top rope, jumping all the way to the other end of the ladder, causing the opposite end to come up and crack King’s face, much like a teeter-totter! Falcon doubles King over with a kick to the gut as he hovers over the ladders. Darius leaps into the air… and drives Adrian’s face into the steel ladder with a Big Bang!

Scott The Scoop:
Who’s going to grab the clipboard first?!

Falcon pulls out a SUPER LADDER and leaves it lying on the entranceway. King blindsides Falcon with a tremendous clothesline. Adrian grabs the top of the ladder, setting it up on the outside of the ring. King grabs the two tables that are still set up right next to the area and drags them over to the side of the ladder. He grabs Falcon and places him on the table. Adrian begins climbing the ladder. King manages to get pretty far up the ladder, but Falcon is off the tables, reappearing in the ring as he flips Adrian King off. Falcon springs to the top rope and jumps onto the ladder from there. Darius and King begin exchanging shots. King fires off a series of brutal strikes and grabs Darius. He sets up a super chokeslam off the top of this super ladder through two tables. Falcon instead bites King’s injured hand and rakes his eyes. He grabs King into a butterfly… Oh, sh*t! ODE TO DARWIN OFF THE SUPER LADDER THROUGH THE TWO TABLES! HOLY F*CKING SH*T!

Scott The Scoop:
AHHHHHHHH!

Komodo:
…Oh… dear… GOD!

Falcon slowly begins climbing the rungs of a ladder set up in the middle of the ring.. He pulls himself up, inch-by-inch, foot-by-foot. King finally rises from the wooden shards and sees what’s going on. He watches helplessly as Falcon reaches the top of the ladder and grabs the clipboard, falling to the mat from the force he used to yank it off the suspension unit. King’s countenance turns grim… His face turns pale…

Scott The Scoop:
Darius has defeated Adrian King, but I have a feeling these two aren’t done with each other yet.

Van Leer turns around while he’s on the ladder… and jumps off with the steel chair, cracking it against Brookes’ skull! The crowd gives him a huge pop as he stands, grinding his teeth and grunting like a madman. He holds the chair up with one hand and then hurls it at the prone Roderick Brookes, hitting him in the body. Lance drops down and fires a few punches to the skull of Roderick Brookes. He begins biting his forehead before jerking his mouth away quickly, revealing a large, bloody spot on Roderick’s face.

Scott The Scoop:
This man is a sick human being…

Komodo:
Sick doesn’t begin to describe Lance Van Leer.

Brookes charges, runs up the ladder, and grabs LVL around the waist… release German Suplex! Van Leer gets tossed halfway across the ring, and Brookes drops to the canvas. He gets back to his feet and climbs the ladder, excitedly grabbing the box above. He opens it and pulls out… one of his patented weapons, a Singapore cane!

Komodo:
Now it’s his turn…

Roderick canes the F*CK out of LVL with a tremendous shot to his side! LVL screams, but Brookes becomes relentless, delivering a series of about six or seven shots to the side of his archrival. LVL is near tears now, and Brookes couldn’t be happier. The broken cane gets dropped to the mat, and Brookes rolls LVL over… but not to cover him. He places LVL’s arms at his side, gets in position… and starts driving a series of knees into the side of Van Leer!

Scott The Scoop:
What a demented son of a bitch!

Roderick tries to grab him for a Dragon Suplex, but LVL stomps on his foot and delivers a backhand to his nose, sending Roderick back a few steps. He holds is bloody head and ponders, most likely wondering how to beat LVL. Van Leer instead charges… but gets caught with a huge twisting spinebuster that slams him into the mat!

Scott The Scoop:
Oh! Roderick Brookes telegraphed it! What a slam!

Roderick Brookes walks over, places a foot on Van Leer’s neck as he lies on the mat, and jerks the box out of his hands. He opens it to reveal… a crowbar. Brookes grins, turns the crowbar, and promptly thrusts it into Van Leer’s forehead! OUCH! He cuts and tears into LVL’s skin with the end of the crowbar; slowly grinding it against his skull the way Brookes’ head was cut open earlier.

Komodo:
Payback’s a bitch!

Lance fires a hard right to Brookes’ jaw. Roderick staggers a few feet back and returns fire with an open-hand palm strike that dazes Van Leer. He doubles LVL over with a kick to the thigh and grabs him in position… PILEDRIVER! Brookes drives Van Leer into the mat. He hooks the leg… one, two, no! LVL is able to shoot a shoulder up, and Brookes seems shocked. He grabs the crowbar at his side and waits on LVL to get to his feet. Brookes holds the weapon and charges Van Leer, but LVL counters… Van Leer Spear! He drives Brookes into the canvas, causing the crowbar to fly out of his hands. A few moments pass before LVL makes the cover… one, two, thr-NO! Brookes kicks out, this time shocking his opponent.

Scott The Scoop:
Is he human?!

Komodo:
Neither one of these guys are human. They’re both ruthless animalistic heathens…

LVL grabs an empty bottle from the pack of PJ Walker Whiskey and sarcastically models it for the camera… before smacking it against Brookes’ arm! …It doesn’t break. Damn, those are built strong. LVL gets pissed off and repeatedly hits the bottle against Brookes’ arm, finally shattering the glass! Brookes shrieks in pain, and his eyes grow large as he rolls on the canvas, kicking and screaming.

Scott The Scoop:
JEEEEEEEEEZUS, that had to hurt!

LVL reaches above and pulls down the box, opening it. We can’t see inside, but LVL can, and a grin spreads across his face as he pulls out… HIS BARBWIRE BALL BAT! He swings the heavy lumber as Brookes is begging LVL off. Van Leer points the bat to Brookes, getting the loudest pop of the night as Roderick begs for him to reconsider. LVL takes a swing at Brookes, but he moves out of the way, and the barbwire sticks in the mat. Brookes capitalizes with a low blow, uppercutting LVL’s testes. He grabs Van Leer from behind afterwards… OH SH*T! COBRA CLUTCH! Brookes lifts LVL… LOCK ‘N LOAD!

Scott The Scoop:
Dammit! Come on, Lance!

Komodo:
Show some objectivity!

LVL grabs Brookes and Irish whips him into the ladder! Brookes reels in pain, and LVL charges… Stinger Splash! He’s a rejuvenated man! Van Leer returns to the other side and tries his Van Leer Spear… but Brookes once again moves out of the way! Van Leer’s head actually goes THROUGH one of the holes in the ladder now, and he seems to be okay… No, he’s better than okay… He LIFTS the ladder. Van Leer swings the ladder on his head and starts spinning it around. Brookes grabs the bag of tacks, and unbeknownst to him, is about to get smacked if he lifts his head up. He does, and LVL whacks him with the end of the ladder, sending him into the mat. Brookes stays low and tries to take out LVL’s legs, but Van Leer is spinning crazily now, and he whacks Brookes’ in the head again.

Scott The Scoop:
Lance Van Leer s the craziest man I’ve ever seen!

The crowd pops, possibly louder than before, as Van Leer whips Brookes with the cuffs. Roderick tries to get to his feet, but LVL hits him in the head with the cuffs, cutting him even deeper. Brookes, in a last ditch effort, makes a wild ass swing, which gets grabbed by LVL and turned into the Crippler Crossface! Instead of wrapping his hands around Brookes’ neck, he uses the handcuffs to begin choking him out! Brookes screams in pain as LVL wrenches back in the choke! Roderick, panicked, begins flailing and kicking about, to no effect. LVL tightens his grips and uses the cuffs to force Roderick’s neck back even further, in a last ditch effort, Brookes begins clawing his way toward some ropes. He reaches out and gets a handful of tacks. Irate at first, Brookes thinks quickly by grabbing them and swinging his hand up, shoving the tacks in LVL’s eye!

Komodo:
Hey, Scott, does PWW pay for optometry bills? Heh.

Van Leer charges Brookes, wielding a pair of handcuffs, trying to hit him, but Brookes hoists him to his shoulders… He’s going for his new move, “Wake The F*ck Up!” Brookes prepares to knee LVL so hard in the face that he’ll fall onto the mound of tacks, but LVL gouges Brookes’ eyes! He grabs Brookes’ arms from behind, cuffing him! The fans cheer as Brookes is cuffed, which I’m sure isn’t an unfamiliar position for him with his run-ins with the law. LVL grabs the defiled steel chair and swings it mightily at Brookes, smacking him right in the head as he’s cuffed from behind. Brookes drops to his knees as blood runs down his entire face. LVL drives the steel chair into his head again, and Roderick drops to the mat this time. LVL rolls him over… One, two, thre-NOOO! Brookes shrugs a shoulder up in the nick of time!

Komodo:
Hahaha! He can’t beat him! It’s impossible! He – wait, what is Lance doing?

Brookes slowly gets to his feet, still cuffed. He turns toward LVL at the same time Van Leer turns around, with a hand on his chin and a thought in his head. LVL shrugs and charges Brookes… VAN LEER SPEAR ONTO THE TACKS! Brookes gets his ass speared onto the thousands of thumbtacks while he’s still cuffed! He shakes in immense pain as trickles of blood run down his body. LVL pins his shoulders on the tacks and hooks both legs

Scott The Scoop:
Do you believe in miracles!?

Daniel Shine:
I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it a thousand goddamn times – Learn to f*cking wrestle, you ignorant twats! I can beat you anytime, anywhere, any f*cking day!

As Shine finishes his last word, the lights suddenly go out, prompting cheers. A loud gong is heard, which transitions into Collapse by Motograter, which gets even louder cheers. Bruce Bishop stands at the entryway when pyrotechnics explode on either side of him. He marches to the ring with purpose as his entrance music blares in the background. Shine throws the mic down and gets ready, pacing a bit as he loosens his hands. Bruce slides into the ring, and comes face-to-face with Daniel Shine, who stares him down. Bruce charges Shine, and Dan tries to take him down with a double leg amateur wrestling style takedown. Bruce blocks it and fires a straight right hand to Shine’s jaw, dazing him. He whips Dan into the ropes, and Shine rebounds… and gets caught with a big boot. Dan staggers into the ropes, and Bruce runs to the other side of the ring… FLYING YAKUZA KICK! Shine gets sent over the top rope to the outside floor as the Bishop of Blood gets to his feet and stares down Shine as he holds his face, cursing Bishop out.

Bruce Bishop:
Anytime… Anywhere… Any… F*CKING… day.

Shine heads to the back, shocked to see Bishop standing in the ring.

Komodo:
Man, did Bruce Bishop just make his mark on Daniel Shine or what?

Transition text. Transition text. BAH GAWD!

Scott The Scoop:
This is it, the main event of the evening. These two are tired, two-all, and tonight, they’re deciding the fate of this company in a pure wrestling match.

Vinaldi attempts a spinning backhand to the face of his adversary, but Kenzo ducks under and grabs Vinaldi… T-Bone Suplex! He drives Drake into the canvas hard, using his own momentum in the process, as all martial artists are trained to do. Kenzo puts the boots to Vinaldi, but Drake slides outside, getting a break before much damage could be done. Intelligent enough to know he cannot win a battle from his back, Vinaldi opts to take the break on the outside for the count of five before returning to the ring. Kenzo charges Vinaldi while he slides into the ring, but Drake quickly throws him through the ropes. Kenzo was not prepared, and he ends up crashing on the outside. After momentarily rolling on the floor in a bit of pain, Katana returns to his feet, meeting a stiff forearm from Vinaldi as he returns from the opposite side of the ring with a topé!

Komodo:
What on earth is Vinaldi thinking? Quit taking unnecessary risks, retard!

Scott The Scoop:
He wants to put on a show for these fans, Jack!

Komodo:
F*ck the fans! Worry about your title!

Drake Vinaldi grabs Kenzo into position for a Fisherman’s Driver. After hoisting him to his shoulders, he attempts to throw him forward into the move, but Katana slips out and drops behind Vinaldi… KATANA KLUTCH! KATANA KLUTCH! Drake falls right into the patented submission finisher of his archrival! Kenzo is trying to choke Vinaldi’s chances away, but Drake is fighting it… He’s struggling toward the ropes. Slowly, he inches his way toward the safe haven of the steel cables… and he grabs the lower rope! Vinaldi uses a rope break to save himself.

Scott The Scoop:
Drake just used a rope break! Katana has an advantage now, Jack.

Komodo:
Yes, but can he use it?

Katana lands on top of Drake and immediately releases a barrage of forearms to the side of his head. Vinaldi quickly throws Kenzo off, getting to his feet as fast as he can. Katana charges him… but gets caught with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex! Kenzo gets dropped on the mat, and Vinaldi makes the immediate cover… but Katana drapes a foot on the lower rope JUST in the nick of time to avoid defeat.

Komodo:
Heh, how about that. The Shooter has a bit of fight in him.

Scott The Scoop:
Vinaldi has evened things up again, with each man having two remaining rope breaks.

Katana quickly fires chop after chop into Vinaldi’s chest while he’s in the corner, with a machine gun’s rapidity. He finishes with a brutal spinning back chop that connects with Drake’s neck. Vinaldi staggers forward, half-dazed and half-amazed at the perseverance of his opponent. Katana attempts a modified Schwein, but Vinaldi counters… TORNADO DDT! He spikes Kenzo into the mat, but is so winded after the prior onslaught that he can’t make an immediate follow-up. Vinaldi slowly inches his way over and covers Kenzo… one, two, thr-No! Kenzo gets a foot on the lower rope to avoid losing the coveted World Title.

Komodo:
Kenzo needs to find another way to get out of these pinfalls. He’s already used two of his rope breaks. Show a little determination, Katana… For God’s Sakes, your title is on the line.

Kenzo’s fired up, yelling in Japanese. Vinaldi turns around and receives a series of wicked slaps and forearms, drilling him right in the head. Katana runs to the ropes and returns… BUSAIKU KNEE KICK! Vinaldi gets send into the canvas. He tries to get up, but Katana grabs him into a reverse facelock… DRAGON SLEEPER! Katana is trying to force Vinaldi into submission. He turns Drake and applies the Dragon Clutch, pulling back on his neck and spine! Vinaldi is in excruciating pain now as Kenzo has gotten a second wind – or, hell, by this point, a third or fourth wind. Drake reaches out for the ropes, slowly pulling himself toward them. He finally makes it, or so he thinks, and Katana suddenly jerks back while wrapping his legs around Vinaldi’s waist… BEAST CHOKER! Vinaldi is trapped in an even more painful situation now. The fans begin chanting “Tap! Tap! Tap!” as Drake tries to fight through the pain. Despite being caught in the hold for nearly a minute, he manages to squirm his way to the ropes and force a break.

Komodo:
That’s more like it, champ! Show some heart! Show some charisma for once in your life!

Vinaldi screams now, finding his own rush of adrenaline, and pulls Kenzo back to his feet. He grabs him… and drills him into the canvas with a Fisherman’s Driver! Vinaldi holds the position… one, two, NO! Kenzo kicks out of one of Vinaldi’s signature moves! A lock of shock appears across Drake’s face, skeptical of the kick out. He questions the referee, giving Kenzo a moment to gather his wits. Katana grabs Drake from behind suddenly and launches him onto his head with an exploding Dragon Suplex! Vinaldi is in trouble now… Katana sets him up… BURNING BLADE! He connects with Drake’s own finishing maneuver right to his head, sending him into the mat. Katana breathes heavily as he rolls Vinaldi over and makes the cover… one, two, thr-NO!

Scott The Scoop:
Neither man is holding back; THEY CAN’T! This is for the World Title!

Kenzo pulls Drake back to his feet and make a throat-slash motion. He grabs Vinaldi from behind, attempting the Katana Klutch, but Vinaldi quickly breaks it out of it, turns, and delivers a sick back brain kick! Kenzo crumbles to the mat, and Drake mounts him… REAR NAKED CHOKE! He has Katana in a chokehold variant, something you’d expect Kenzo to be doing, but not Vinaldi! Drake wrenches on the hold, choking the life out of his heated adversary. Katana crawls and rolls while trying to get out of it, but Vinaldi has great positioning with a body scissors and a tight lock around the throat. Katana eventually rolls over, and it looks like he’s unconscious… The referee grabs his hand and raises it once – it drops. He holds it again and raises it a second time – it again drops. The referee raises the hand a third time as the thousands of viewers in the Times Union Center and the millions watching at home wait in anticipation… It doesn’t fall! Kenzo pumps his fist and reaches out, grabbing the lower rope, forcing a break!

Komodo:
Dammit, Kenzo! You’re out of rope breaks!

Scott The Scoop:
Right you are, Komodo… Drake holds the power now.

Kenzo has a sinister grin on his face between cringes of pain and agony. He wipes some blood from his head and kicks Drake in the head a couple times. Kenzo realizes the count is reaching its climax and rolls inside the ring. Kenzo looks outward at his opponent, as the referee’s count has reached sixteen. All Katana has to do is stay inside. He sees Vinaldi struggling to crawl to the ring. Kenzo looks at him… and sighs, before rolling out of the ring. The man isn’t full of sh*t. He DOES have honor. We may never know if Vinaldi would have made it to the ring in time, but we do know that Kenzo doesn’t want to beat him this way. Katana rolls Vinaldi inside and makes the cover, but Drake is able to fire a shoulder up before three.

Komodo:
What f*cking wrestling school did this man go to? TAKE THE WIN, IDIOT!

He mounts him and begins throwing elbow after elbow into Drake’s head. The referee checks, unsure if Vinaldi is fighting back. He asks Drake if he can continue, and Vinaldi responds by kneeing Kenzo so hard in the head that he flies back, falling to the mat! Vinaldi kips up, pounding his chest, and turns toward Kenzo, who’s shocked as hell in the corner. Vinaldi charges… SHINING WIZARD OMEGA! Another page out of the Kenzo Katana playbook! He hoists Kenzo to the top turnbuckle and gives him the up yours signal. Vinaldi climbs to the top… He’s going for an Avalanche Brainbuster! Kenzo blocks it with a few punches to the stomach and instead grabs Vinaldi around the waist… OH SH*T! SUPERBOMB! Kenzo drills Vinaldi into the mat with a release super bomb, using the last ounce of his energy to destroy the last bit of Vinaldi’s!

Scott The Scoop:
Cover him, Kenzo! Get up, Drake! Gah… I’m conflicted… I… I’m hyperventilating!

Komodo:
Put a bag over it, Scott. I’m trying to watch here!

The referee begins counting both men down. He reaches ten, and neither man is moving. He continues to fifteen, and neither man has budged. James Simpson appears atop the entranceway, looking on at the two men in the ring. The fans have a mixed response for him as he watches the referee reach seventeen, with each man slowly rolling on the mat, but being unable to stand. At eighteen, James begins to walk to the ring. The referee gets to nineteen, and Simpson slides inside the ring. He raises his hand for twenty, but Simpson grabs it, holding it down. The referee turns to him… and Simpson punches the referee out with a huge shot! The ref falls to the mat, holding his head. James begins stomping a mudhole in his ass. He rips the referee’s shirt off and puts it on over his suit and tie. He kicks the referee out of the ring to a huge pop and turns toward Drake and Kenzo, yelling at them to get it on. Vinaldi and Katana stare at each other and slowly begin to remove the tape on their wrists and fists. They each tear it all away, and Vinaldi pulls down his shin pads. Kenzo does the same, and each man is ready to unleash it all here tonight.

Scott The Scoop:
…UN… FREAKING… REAL!

Vinaldi attempts a brainbuster, but at the height of the move, Katana knees him in the head. Kenzo lands on the mat and kicks Drake right in the head! He leaps and grabs Drake’s arm, rolling him through into a jujigatame cross armbar! Vinaldi’s trying to fight out of it, but his foot gets on the rope, and Simpson orders a break. He points to it, and Drake looks, not realizing he was so close to the ropes.

Komodo:
They’re both out of rope breaks now… Who will seize the advantage?

He sets Drake up… Kenzo is going for an avalanche brainbuster now, deciding to try the move Vinaldi had attempted on him several times in this match. It looks like he’s going to do it… but at the last second, Vinaldi knees Kenzo in the stomach. Drake grabs Kenzo around the leg… SNUFFED OUT!!!! DANGEROOOOUUUSSSSS!!!!!!!! VINALDI CONNECTS WITH A SUPER FISHERMAN’S DRIVER! He hooks both legs, and Simpson drops… he counts the one… the two… and reluctantly, the three! DRAKE VINALDI HAS DONE IT!

Komodo:
I don’t believe it, Scott! We’ve got a new champion!

Scott The Scoop:
…DRAKE VINALDI HAS BEATEN KENZO KATANA! VINALDI… REIGNS… SUPREME!

After the video airs, we join in progress as James Simpson is standing in the center of the ring, microphone in hand and a solemn expression on his face.

James Simpson:
As all of you are aware, at Malice, we had the crowning of a… new… Pro Wrestling Warriors World Champion.

The crowd erupts for Drake Vinaldi.

James Simpson:
I believe now is the appropriate time to express my personal admiration of Kenzo Katana, a man who held the PWW World Championship with great respect and admiration. He was an honorable man who is worthy to hold any world championship in any promotion across the globe, and to say he chose to wrestle in Pro Wrestling Warriors is a huge asset to this company in itself.

The crowd cheers for Katana as well, their former favorite.

James Simpson:
With this loss, Kenzo Katana has returned to Japan to once again wrestle in the country where he has received much of his acclaim and notoriety. Much to my chagrin, yes, Drake Vinaldi is the new World Champion. However, as of late, he has not acted in the manner that we here at Pro Wrestling Warriors have come to expect. He does not behave as a champion should, and his actions are not becoming of a representative of this great industry. Therefore, tonight will be Vinaldi’s first… and last title defense. He is wrestling a man with whom he has had quite a strategic alliance. But as the saying goes, there is no honor among thieves, and Roderick Brookes…

Simpson now focuses his attention solely on the camera that is facing him.

James Simpson:
With the PWW World Championship comes great power, great fame, and perhaps most importantly to you, a great deal of money. Money you can use to legally obtain a mode of transportation. Drake, I will admit that if I had my choice between yourself and Roderick Brookes, you would be my choice as the “lesser of two evils.” However, desperate times call for desperate measures. I am willing to place you in this match with the title on the line in hopes that neither of you will be able to compete afterwards. And in the worst-case scenario, I know how far you’re willing to go to remain the PWW World Champion. So, having Roderick Brookes as the World Champion for a week before the next contender crushes him isn’t such an unreasonable situation… heh.

The crowd boos Simpson’s smug attitude and loath for Drake Vinaldi.

James Simpson:
Now, speaking of contenders, it is important to confirm the announcement made on our website earlier this week. There WILL indeed be a four corner survival match between four of the top contenders in Pro Wrestling Warriors next week, right here on FX!’s “War,” for the number one contender’s trophy. Throughout the week, the contenders will be revealed. But tonight, I’m going to let the fans who paid their money to attend this event in New Jersey find out one of those contenders before anybody else. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you one of the four contenders who will participate in the Four Corner Survival match next week…

Darius Falcon!

The crowd erupts with boos as Darius Falcon makes his way to the ring, heavily bruised and bandaged from his fight with Adrian King at Malice. Despite these obvious injuries, he has a smile on his face for perhaps the first time in months. Falcon walks up the steps and enters the ring. James Simpson applauds him as he reaches Simpson and shakes his hand. Falcon receives the microphone as Simpson bows out gracefully, letting him know the floor is his.

Darius Falcon:
Wrestling patrons, lend me your ears…

Falcon clears his throat in a very cocky manner, getting on the fans’ nerves quickly.

Darius Falcon:
As you have witnessed at the top of this broadcast, I have defeated Adrian King.

The crowd boos immediately.

Darius Falcon:
Not only have I defeated Adrian King, but I have destroyed, decimated, and defiled everything Adrian King stands for. After the weeks of questioning and insecurity – the months of hatred and antipathy we’ve shared for one another – and after the callous actions that have taken place over the last few months – of which I am not the only member – I have come out the righteous victor, solidifying my claims and fulfilling my prophecy! I… HAVE… DEFEATED… ADRIAN KING!

Falcon raises his arms in the air, emitting more jeers from the New Jersey crowd.

Darius Falcon:
Adrian King, I hold no more sympathy for you or your kind. Repetitively, I have warned you… I have told you that your deleterious lifestyle is antiquated. If our enmity has served one purpose, it is proving that my pure existence is the way of champions. Your beer-swilling, cigarette-smoking, feeble-minded philosophy has gained you nothing but scars and bruises, while my clean-cut, boundary-free ideology has gained me… this.

Darius reaches into the pocket of his trench coat, revealing a crumpled piece of paper. He smoothes it on his jacket, holding it high for the audience to see.

Darius Falcon:
You see, King, for as anti-religious as I tend to be, at Malice, I will admit I was weak. I was insecure. I wasn’t one hundred percent sure that I would come through and tactfully obliterate you in our bout. Now, ninety-nine percent sure may be good enough for some people, but not me. I strive for perfection. Therefore, I needed some motivation. I needed… to make a deal with the devil.

In my timidity, I sought the one man who I knew would understand a brilliant proposition. I sought… James Simpson.

More boos from this spiteful crowd.

Darius Falcon:
James Simpson and I have not always been the best of friends. In fact, even standing before him now, I know that he’s using me in the same manner I used him. I hold in my hand… the paper I retrieved last night after I humiliatingly beat you, Adrian. This paper… heh… this piece of paper that you thought was so meaningless. Oh, how you were wrong… This holds the contract for my guaranteed spot in the number one contender’s match next week. Hahahaha…

More boos. Get off his back, ya wankers.

Darius Falcon:
Oh, shove it, sheep. If you were in my situation and had an ounce of perspicacity, you would’ve done the same damn thing. Adrian, losing to me meant so much more than you knew… Losing to me has gained me… freedom. It has given me… hope. No longer am I shackled in this rivalry with you… No, now, I have something to aspire for. I have something… to live for. Next week, when I beat three other men and make the rightful claim as the number one contender, I want you to be the first one to witness my prevalence and congratulate me, because… maybe… I’ll be in a generous mood, and after I take the World Title from that undeserving bastard Drake Vinaldi, I might give you a shot. The Falcon is in flight, Adrian King… and you’re the man who opened the cage. Hahahaha…

Falcon drops the mic, his music playing from the sound system again. He exits the ring as we cut to a commercial before returning for our opening match.


Match one:
Richard Storrs versus Dun
Exhibition: Singles

Making his debut in our opening contest is a man whom has received much acclaim over the last week due to his popular segment on last week’s War. Tonight, Dun begins his quest to spread his philosophical views via Pro Wrestling Warriors. His opponent, Richard Storrs, has had a string of wins as of late. It will be interesting to see who walks away with victory tonight. Dun offers Storrs a handshake, but he slaps it away, showing disrespect to his opponent. The contrast in size and style is evident from the beginning as Dun shoves Richard into the corner during their collar and elbow tie-up. Dun gives Storrs a clean break. Richard moves in for a lock-up again, but this time goes behind Dun. He tries to take him down to the mat, but with nearly thirty pounds on him, Dun easily blocks the endeavor, as well as the waistlock, and goes behind Storrs, lifting him into the air for a back suplex to the canvas. Dun covers, being sure to place his weight on the shoulders, and gets a two count. He pulls Storrs to his feet and fires an open-handed strike, sending Richard staggering to the ropes. Dun attempts to follow up, but Storrs uses an eyepoke to momentarily regain momentum. He applies a side headlock, from which Dun easily shoves Storrs into the ropes. Richard attempts a shoulder block, but is humbled by Dun’s large frame. He runs to the ropes and attempts it again, but Dun once again block the endeavor, getting support from the crowd. Storrs motions for Dun to run to the ropes, and he does, but Richard simply walks away from him, showing that he can easily manipulate his opponent. Dun doesn’t take kindly to this, grabbing Richard from behind… bridging German Suplex! Storrs gets planted on his head but still kicks out at two.

Dun tries to maintain the advantage, but again he finds himself on the receiving end of a cheap tactic, this time Storrs backhands Dun between the legs, just out of the referee’s view. Dun doubles over, and Storrs follows with a jawbreaker. The man who is perhaps the antithesis of everything Storrs stands for is suddenly finding himself on the receiving end of a harsh welcoming to PWW. Storrs delivers a few rights to Dun’s jaw while he’s recovering in the corner. He Irish whips Dun across the ring and follows by leaping and driving both of his knees into Dun’s chest. Dun falls to a knee, and Storrs spreads his hands apart, taunting the crowd. Dun looks angry and charges Storrs as he turns around… vicious clothesline! Storrs gets dropped to the mat. Dun makes the cover, again making sure to appropriately place his weight on Storrs’ shoulders, but Richard kicks out at two. Dun pulls Richard to his feet and tries to back suplex him, but Storrs shows some skill by flipping and landing behind Dun, before chop blocking him in the leg, taking the bigger man down. He runs to the ropes and returns… shining wizard! Dun gets a knee to the face, and Storrs makes a cocky cover, getting a two count.

Storrs applies a rear chinlock, trying to ground Dun to avoid him from using his size advantage. Dun attempts to battle back, but every time it seems as though he’s on the rebound, Storrs finds a way to shorten the gap between Dun and the mat. First it’s with a kick to the kneecap, and then by raking his eyes. The referee catches each of these and warns Storrs not to try it again. Richard then applies an abdominal stretch, working over Dun’s body as well. As the referee asks Dun if he wants to submit, Richard reaches back and grabs hold of the rope to illegally gain leverage. When the referee realizes it, Storrs quickly releases the rope. The ref goes back to checking Dun, and Storrs does it again. This time the referee kicks Storrs’ arm, causing Dun to use the momentum to throw Storrs into the mat! The fans get behind him as Richard gets to his feet and Dun grabs him… The Progressor! Dun drills Storrs into the canvas with the move. He makes the cover, but Richard kicks out in the nick of time. Dun pulls Storrs to his feet and tries to whip him into the ropes. Storrs reverses and charges Dun, preparing a big move… but Dun catches him… Social Collapse! He grabs Storrs before he can fall to the canvas, applying a three-quarter facelock… AFFIRMATIVE ACTION! Dun drives Storrs’ face into the mat! He rolls Richard over and hooks the leg… one, two, three!

Winner: Dun via Pinfall at 9:50

Dun gets a rousing response from the crowd. While Storrs lies on the mat, still confused at what just occurred, Dun shakes his hand, leaving with a smile and a big victory.


Match two:
Kenn Xenon versus Tyler Hart
Exhibition: Singles

With our second debut of the evening, it will be interesting to see if he can capitalize on the element of surprise like Dun, or if he will fall to the technical mastery of his opponent, the shining star of the Awakening, and one half of the World Tag Champs, Tyler Hart. In an opposite situation of our opening match, these two are knowledgeable in very similar styles. We begin with a lock-up, but Hart quickly goes behind Xenon, throwing him into the mat with a slam. Xenon works his way around to a sitting position and breaks the waistlock. He wrenches Hart’s arm and fires a few elbows into the elbow joint, before Tyler quickly snaps off an armdrag, sending Kenn into the canvas. Azia—I mean, Xenon, gets to his feet, but Hart grabs his hand this time, applying a knuckle lock. He twists the arm back and uses his other arm to apply a loose keylock. He uses this to keep Xenon at bay as he forces him into the ropes. Hart frees the grip and fires a stiff chop to Xenon’s chest. Xenon holds his chest for a moment before responding with a chop of his own, firing a nasty one right to Hart’s chest. Tyler kicks Xenon in the stomach and throws him through the ropes, sending him to the outside. He struts arrogantly as Xenon lies on the floor, nursing his back. He gets to his feet, but Hart runs to the adjacent turnbuckles, springs off the rope, and flips all the way over the top rope, nailing a quebrada! He lands on his feet, spreads his arms, and takes a bow, soaking in the cheers from the crowd. He may be a cocky straightedge atheist, but dammit, he’s a good wrestler.

Hart rolls Xenon into the ring, placing a forearm in the side of his face as he makes a pin attempt. He only gets two before Kenn kicks out. Hart applies a three-quarter facelock, but keeps Xenon sitting on the mat to really stretch him out. He eventually releases the hold in favor of applying a side headlock, lifting Xenon to his feet, and throwing him back to the canvas with a takeover. Kenn lifts his legs and shows some dexterity by wrapping them around Hart’s head, applying a headscissors. Hart works his way around to Xenon’s front as he sits calmly on the mat. Hart hops to one side, then the other, and then leaps all the way out of the hold, dropkicking Xenon in the face shortly thereafter. Xenon rolls back and gets to his feet. Hart tries to pursue Xenon, but the debuting wrestler blocks a clothesline attempt and responds with a victory roll, getting a two count. He gets back to his feet, and Hart returns to his as well. Xenon doubles Hart over with a kick and tries a snap suplex, but Tyler blocks it with a few punches to the stomach. He lifts Xenon, draping him on the top rope. Hart leaves him there momentarily as he springs off the middle rope, attempting a twisting sledge to the back. Xenon slides off the ropes and lands on the apron, causing Hart to miss. Tyler lands on his feet and turns to Xenon, who grabs him around the head and drops off the apron, dropping Hart’s neck across the top rope. Tyler falls back, holding his throat, and Xenon returns to the ring. He sets up… standing moonsault! Xenon makes the cover… one, two, no! The prodigy kicks out!

Kenn begins climbing to the top rope, most likely setting up some sort of dive, but Hart gets to his feet, crotching Xenon. He climbs to the middle ropes, and then to the top… Hart grabs Xenon… SUPERPLEX! Both men fall from the top rope, crashing to the canvas with great strength. After a moment, Hart makes the cover, but Xenon isn’t dead yet. He kicks out before the three, wowing some of the spectators here in Jersey. Hart lifts Xenon back into a seated position… HARD kick to the spine! Xenon cringes with pain, and Hart connects with a dropkick to the back of his head. He rebounds off the ropes and drives a knee into the side of his skull and makes the cover, but again Xenon finds enough strength to kick out in time. Tyler tries to lift Xenon again, but this time the debuting star delivers an uppercut to the throat and follows with a sit-out jawbreaker. With Hart stunned, he grabs him into a side headlock, runs to the ropes, springs off, and connects with a springboard bulldog! Xenon rolls Hart onto his shoulders and covers… but Tyler kicks out before three.

Kenn makes a weird taunt and pulls Hart to his feet. He grabs him into a full nelson, attempting a leg sweep. Hart breaks the hold and fires some elbows into Kenn’s sternum. Tyler drops Kenn onto his shoulder with a stunner, and follows by charging off the ropes… LARIAT! Kenn gets drilled into the mat! Hart holds the position… but Xenon kicks out! Wow! Hart is pissed now, but he pulls Xenon back to his feet… POWERBOMB! One, two, thre-NO! Xenon still kicks out! Hart grabs his legs… and locks on the Texas Funeral! Xenon is in trouble… He’s trying to crawl his way to the ropes… slowly he inches and finally reaches, forcing a break. Hart pulls Xenon, trying another powerbomb, but this time Kenn counters at the peak of the move, rolling Hart into a sunset flip. Tyler kicks out and rolls onto his feet, trying a dropkick. Kenn instead drops back, avoiding the contact, and gets to his feet. Hart looks up… and is on the receiving end of a sick spin kick! Xenon drags Hart over to the corner and sits on the middle rope. He grabs him into a reverse facelock and attempts the diamond dust, but Hart grabs hold of the middle rope and blocks it. Xenon lands on his feet in front of Hart… and Hart delivers the Lung Blower! Xenon’s back is in bad shape now, and Tyler knows it. He climbs to the top rope… HART BREAKER! Tyler hooks the legs… one, two, three!

Winner: Tyler Hart via Pinfall at 11:45

Hart does a cocky strut as he holds up his PWW Tag Title. I think the real story is the determination that Kenn Xenon displayed in this bout in spite of a loss.


Araña, Rob Cavallo and Alex Michaels versus Chris Linden, Brett Stokes and Tristan Novak
Exhibition: Lucha Libre Six-Man Tag Team

If you don’t think this match is going to get out of control in a hurry, you’ve probably never seen one. Novak and Cavallo begin things, not that it means too much. Novak has been wrestling Michaels a lot lately. Let’s see how he can adapt to Cavallo’s style. Novak forgoes a lock up by firing some low kicks to Cavallo’s leg. He whips him into the ropes and attempts to leapfrog over, but Cavallo catches him and delivers a big flapjack, driving Novak’s face into the mat. Rob pulls Tristan to his feet but gets blindsided by a shot from Chris Linden. Linden nails him in the back with a forearm and throws Rob into the heel corner. Araña starts bitching at the referee in Portuguese or whatever language he speaks, confusing him. Linden takes advantage by blatantly choking Cavallo in the corner. He lets go, and Stokes holds Cavallo as Linden fires some shots to his ribcage. He pulls Rob out of the corner and delivers a frankensteiner, sending him into the mat. Chris makes the cover, yelling at the referee to count. He turns around and makes the count, but… Araña… throw a blow-up doll at Linden, infuriating him. Where the hell did THAT come from? Linden grabs the doll and punts it into the crowd. Nice kick. Linden tries to grab Araña, but he scampers back to his ring quickly, getting in Linden’s head. Chris whips Cavallo into the ropes, but Rob springs off the middle rope and delivers a huge moonsault to Linden as he’s standing, sending both men to the mat. Rob rolls out of the ring, and Michaels comes into the ring, waiting on Chris to get back to his feet. Michaels connects with a low kick to Linden’s thigh, then a kick to his stomach. He runs to the ropes and tries a spin kick... but gets caught… and dropped with a big backbreaker! Chris this time rolls out of the ring, letting Tristan Novak get his hands – or boots, rather – on Alex Michaels as he stomps him in the head. Tristan pulls Alex to his feet and fires a few punches to his head. He runs to the ropes, and Michaels attempts a high kick. Tristan ducks and dropkicks Michaels in the leg. Alex staggers, holding his knee, and Tristan promptly chop blocks him, sending him into the mat. It looks like Tristan it going after the same body part he focused on at Malice.

Novak wraps his hands around Alex’s foot and applies a cravat of the heel. Michaels writhes in pain, but neither of his opponents can help him. Novak mouths off to Rob Cavallo before hocking a big loogie at him, which misses, thankfully. Cavallo, however, gets pissed off and tries to enter the ring. This gives Linden time to spring off the top rope and drop a leg on Michaels as he’s prone in Tristan’s submission. After Linden slides out of the ring, Novak grabs Michaels’ leg and rolls forward, snapping it against his body. Pain shoots up his leg, and he tries to make a tag, but Tristan drags him back toward his corner and tags in Brett Stokes. Brett climbs to the top rope as Novak holds Michaels steady… big senton back splash from Stokes on the back of Alex Michaels! Brett rolls him over and makes the cover, but Rob comes into the ring and grabs Stokes around his leg, pulling him off Alex to prevent a loss. Stokes slaps Cavallo in the face, infuriating him. Cavallo screams at Stokes, who promptly runs, sliding out of the ring. Cavallo chases him, and Novak meanwhile comes in, the new legal man. He places some kicks in Michaels’ leg and applies a half crab, using Alex’s preferred submission style against him. Novak tries to transition to an STF, but Michaels gets to the ropes, forcing a break. Alex hobbles to his feet, and Novak tries to do another chop block. Michaels side steps and kicks Tristan right in the head. Michaels jumps and tags in Araña, who comes in, excited to get his chance against Novak. Tristan swings at Araña, but he ducks under and rebounds off the ropes… satellite headscissors! Novak gets sent to the mat. He slides out of the ring, and Stokes comes inside now… and Araña takes him down with a huracarrana! Stokes goes down as well and slides out to meet Novak. Linden blindsides Araña, hitting him in the back with a forearm. He knees him in the stomach and whips him into the ropes. Araña instead grabs the ropes like a freaking spider, hanging between the middle and top, hooking them with his hands and feet. Linden charges him, but Araña moves out of the way, causing Linden to go out of the ring. He looks up and sees Araña jump on him with a plancha! Linden goes down.

Meanwhile, Stokes and Novak return to the ring as Michaels and Cavallo are back inside. Stokes and Novak each try a clothesline, but Michaels and Cavallo duck in stereo and grab them… stereo facebusters! They each make a cover, but Stokes and Novak kick out at the same time. Michaels grabs Novak and fires a stiff chop to his chest. He attempts a belly to belly suplex, but Novak blocks it with an eye gouge and leaps, grabbing Novak around his head with his legs, and falling over the top ropes, delivering a huracarrana on his adversary to the outside floor. Both men crash on the outside, and Stokes takes advantage of Cavallo being distracted by grabbing him from behind with a schoolboy. Cavallo kicks out in the nick of time. Araña and Linden return to the ring, with Linden rolling Araña inside after getting the advantage on the floor. He sees Cavallo and tries to bum rush him, but Rob uses Linden’s momentum against him, sending him into the corner. Cavallo whips Chris into Araña, who sends him face-first into the mat with a drop toehold. Araña drops a spiraling leg drop on the back of Linden’s head, rolls him over, and makes a cover, but Linden powers out at two. Cavallo grabs Chris from behind, but The Future is no match for the Next Generation’s back elbow to the nose. Cavallo finds himself in the corner as Linden connects with a huge dropkick to the side of the head, sending Cavallo down to the mat. Linden grabs a charging Araña and hotshots him onto the top rope. Araña staggers about and gets caught by Linden, who places the smallest man in the match on the top rope. He climbs, most likely preparing a superplex. Linden stands on the top rope, trying to superplex Araña off. Araña blocks it, and Cavallo and Michaels return to the ring, grabbing Linden from behind as they climb to the middle ropes. They’re going for a double back superplex! Stokes and Novak are back inside, and they grab Michaels and Cavallo from behind… They powerbomb them into the mat, causing Linden to be back superplexed and Araña to be superplexed from the top rope! TOWER OF DOOOOOOM~!

Araña is out of it as he lies on the mat, obviously unable to move. Linden isn’t in much better shape, and neither Michaels nor Cavallo is able to get back to his feet. Stokes covers Michaels, but he kicks out at two and a half. Novak covers Cavallo to the same result. Linden covers Araña, and Araña is even able to get a shoulder up in time. The crowd cheers the men on as they return to their feet. Linden clotheslines Araña over the top rope and turns his attention to Cavallo, who is being attacked by Brett Stokes. Stokes and Linden grab Cavallo into a double suplex attempt. Instead, Michaels fires a punch to the kidney of Brett Stokes and grabs him. Cavallo and Michaels try to double suplex Linden and Stokes, but Novak prevents it by sledging both Cavallo and Michaels in the back. He joins Stokes’ side and tries to suplex both men with his partners, but Araña returns to the ring. He grabs Novak and Stokes, trying to help Michaels and Cavallo. Araña, Michaels, and Cavallo get lifted into the air by Linden, Stokes, and Novak, but at the last second regain momentum, drop to their feet, and launch their three opponents overhead with a triple suplex! The crowd goes nuts as carnage ensues in the squared-circle!

Araña gets to his feet first, springing off the middle rope… he moonsaults on Novak! Araña hooks the leg, but Linden breaks it up and tosses him out of the ring. He follows him this time, trying to deal out more damage to the man who embarrassed him at Malice. Meanwhile, Stokes swings at Michaels, but the Traditional Champion grabs him into a straitjacket hold and delivers a straitjacket suplex! He isn’t done yet… Michaels rolls Stokes onto his front and applies a bowtie submission hold, pulling back in a modified crossface submission with both arms wrapped around Stokes’ neck. Novak grabs Michaels’ legs while he has the hold on and twists him into a crooked figure four, with Stokes still trapped in the hold! Cavallo grabs Stokes legs and crosses them into a modified deathlock before flipping forward, holding the top leg, and wrapping his legs around Novak’s neck! What the fuuuuuuudge?! Cavallo is getting the best of this exchange. The referee asks any of the men if they want to give up, but Linden suddenly appears on the apron… springboard shooting star press on Cavallo! The fans go crazy as Cavallo gets crushed, releasing the hold. The other three men release theirs as well. Linden grabs Cavallo and whips him into the ropes… huracarrana on his return! Michaels grabs Linden from behind, attempting a German Suplex, but Chris heel kicks him in the groin and throws Michaels out of the ring. Linden grabs hold of the top rope, springs off, and delivers a shooting star press on the outside on Alex Michaels! Holy sh*t! It takes a moment, but they return to their feet… just as Tristan Novak flips over the top rope with a plancha suicida, wiping out both his arch nemesis and his partner by mistake! They return to their feet slowly as well, with Linden and Novak arguing, and Michaels hobbling. Here… comes… Rob Cavallo. Cavallo slingshots over… corkscrew crossbody on all three men! The fans are going crazy! Here comes Brett Stokes now. He climbs to the top turnbuckle and jumps off… double corkscrew senton on all four men! Araña is in the ring now… Here it comes. He springs off the top as the five men brawl beneath him… 630 Senton on ALL FIVE MEN! WHAAAAAT?!

The crowd whistles, cheers, and f*cking blows the roof off the place as a heap of flesh and bone lies on the outside. After a moment passes, They slowly file back inside the ring. Araña covers Linden, but Novak breaks it up. He grabs Araña… ABOLITION! Cover… one, two, thr-No! Rob Cavallo saves it at the last second. He pulls Novak to his feet. Time Splitter! Cavallo is going to the top rope… Could it be the Fall from Valhalla? We’ll never know, because Brett Stokes crotches Cavallo on the top rope… super huracarrana! Cavallo lands on top of Novak, much to Stokes’ chagrin! Both Novak and Cavallo end up rolling out of the ring. Stokes doesn’t see Alex Michaels behind him… ALEX MICHAELS EXPERIENCE! He hooks both legs… one, two, thre-NO! Chris Linden saves it for his team. He grabbed the stunned Alex Michaels… DAMAGE REPORT! Linden is to his feet… STANDING DOUBLE CORKSCREW SHOOTING STAR WHATTHEF*CKWASTHAT?! Araña is back to his feet… standing somersault leg drop to the back of Linden’s head as he tries to pin Alex Michaels! Araña grabs Linden… wheelbarrow bulldog! He’s going to the apron… Araña’s preparing a big move here. Linden is to his feet. Araña springs off… SPIDERRANA! NO! Linden catches him in the move… He hoists Araña to his shoulders… but Araña flips over and lands on his feet. He jumps to Linden’s shoulders, attempting a reverse frankensteiner. Linden throws him off right in front of him… FIELD GOAL~! FIELD GOAL~! THREE POINTS TO LINDEN’S TEAM! Chris grabs Araña… Perfection Incarnate! Linden drags Araña to the corner. He’s climbing to the top rope. Cavallo and Michaels climb on the apron, trying to stop him, but Novak dropkicks Michaels in the knee, causing him to fall off the apron, and Brett Stokes pulls Cavallo off the apron, causing him to smack his face off the apron! Linden leaps off… SHOOTING LINDEN PRESS! He covers Araña… one, two, three!

Winners: Chris Linden, Tristan Novak, and Brett Stokes

Linden looms over Araña, but Cavallo and Michaels return to the ring, shoving him out of the way. They check on their fallen partner as Chris smirks, leaving the ring with HIS partners on the winning team, who are quite enthused to pick up the victory.

Main Event:
Drake Vinaldi © versus Roderick Brookes
Exhibition: Singles; PWW World Heavyweight Championship

And now it’s time for the match we’ve been waiting for… With James Simpson watching from the commentary table at ringside, the thousands in attendance cheer raucously as Drake Vinaldi makes his way to the ring, staring at Roderick Brookes as he waits on him. Vinaldi enters the ring, throws his belt down, and gets right in the face of Roderick Brookes. Todd Duvet has a difficult time announcing the men, but he manages to somehow get them to cooperate without coming to blows. The referee explains the rules, calls for the bell, and the match is underway. The fans cheer as Vinaldi stares at Brookes, trying to psyche him out. Brookes, however, isn’t intimidated, and sneers back at our World Champ. The surly Brookes was once the confidant of Drake Vinaldi, but their relationship has gone sour over the last few weeks. Oh, here comes the first contact… Brookes shoves Vinaldi in the chest, causing him to stagger back a few steps. Drake smirks, rubbing his chin. He returns to Brookes, and with one finger, pokes him in the chest, and he – what? Roderick… goes down to the mat. What the f*ck is this?! Vinaldi places a foot on Roderick’s chest while pointing to Simpson, grinning knowingly. James’ face turns beet red as he witnesses the referee reluctantly count the one… two… and three.

Winner and STILL PWW World Heavyweight Champion: Drake Vinaldi

Vinaldi grins as Brookes returns to his feet, chortling at James Simpson. They share a laugh at his expense, and he looks to be nearly in tears… however, he grabs the collar on his shirt and silently voices something. Within seconds, Tyler Hart, Zack Wicked, and Darius Falcon appear behind Brookes and Vinaldi! The Champ and his only friend turn around at the same time, but are bashed in the head with steel chairs at the same time! Oh, what a cruel fate! They have received their comeuppance in the same manner they made their impact at No Escape! How ironic…

Simpson is yelling orders from ringside now. Hart and Wicked pull Brookes to his feet. Wicked hoists all 260 pounds of Brookes to his shoulders… and drives him into the canvas with a Wickedbomb! Hart kicks Brookes out of the ring and focuses his attention on Vinaldi. Falcon peers over the World Champion as a trickle of blood slowly makes its way down Vinaldi’s stereotypically large nose. Hart removes his belt and hands it to Falcon. He turns Drake over, placing him on his stomach. Falcon wraps the belt around Drake’s throat and chokes the life out of him! Simpson grabs the PWW World Championship and holds it against Vinaldi’s head, allowing the reflection of this show of disrespect gleam in the belt’s face. Falcon chuckles maniacally as Vinaldi’s eyes roll back in their sockets and he loses consciousness. We fade from the disturbing scene of The Awakening standing tall with James Simpson.

[Evil Lincoln!]

Yay winning. The match was f*cking awesome and I loved it.

Fingerpoke of Doom Part Deux was...interesting...to say the least.

[Slick Rick]

GG.

[The-Joker]

WHAAAT?
WHAAAT?

WHAAAT DID HE JUST DOOOO?

[Evil Lincoln!]

BAH GAWD KING, IT'S THE NEW JERSEY SCREWJOB AND SIMPSON JUST GOT SCREWED! BAH GAWD!

[Dun]

Tight show, good stuff.

[xdarqpez1x]

I'm hesitant to say this but... I believe they just deviated from the script! What... is going on here?

[Disposable Hero]

So I read the six-man tag in my Programming class, and people were wondering why I randomly exclaimed "OOOOOOOOOOOOH" during the dive to the outside sequence.

This sh*t was awesome. :D